and i want to go back again

Yesterday was hard. I dont know why I was so sad, but I was. Sometimes I just dont feel like doing this. I dont feel like growing up. I dont feel like paying insurance. I really dont feel like getting a job. I just feel like Im not living for much and I have no purpose. I know its a little dramatic, but when Im in the middle of these moods I just dont know how to shake it. Its hard to seek jobs when I have no desire to do anything. Its also hard to look for a place in the world when Im not sure what God wants me to do. Ive been reading irresistable revolution and its really rocking my world. maybe Im supposed to screw the system and live in community and love people for a living or somehow bring my "skills" to the community, but what are my skills. Or maybe Im supposed to go to another country and live among them and meet thier needs...Or maybe Im supposed to be in Kansas city working as a waitress or a barista until I can take my dumb test and then get my masters in midwifry so I can be useful in that way.....I dont know. I realize that I dont need all of the answers right now because that would be overwhelming, but somedays I need a clue, ya know. Anyway, today was good....i got over myself and I applied for a bunch of jobs and even had a small interview at Comedy City. It was a better day....I didnt watch elizabethtown and bawl every five seconds like yesterday....Its true. I cry sometimes, deal with it.
I love you all
Megan