homecoming

As I was driving to Indiana from Olivet last night, I started digesting my first homecoming. I will admit I did not know what to expect. I was definitly excited. I wanted to see so many people and be back "home." I would say that homecoming was a success. I hate small talk and surfacy conversations with people and my biggest homecoming fear was that I would get a lot of that and not much else.....i was way off. Somehow I saw everyone I could possibly see and I even had time to sit with each one and have good conversation. It was amazing. All of this made me think about my previous blog. I really do feel like this weekend was full of grace. I got a glimpse of the kingdom. I felt loved and accepted and everyone was excited to see everyone else. I loved that. Then as I was getting into my car, I got a voicemail from some coworkers and a customer from KCMO and I was reminded again how lucky I am to be where I am now. So again, why would I ever leave this place? Why would I choose to be away from people who love me and consider me family? because no matter where I go, God continues to allow me to be surrounded by loved ones. MAybe they dont start out as loved ones, but it doesnt always take long to build relationships that mean something and might even last a long time. This doesnt mean that I will be able to have that every place that I go, but I know that the potential exists and that even if they are not physically with me, they are somewhere loving me and the hope of a "homecoming" has to be enough to sustain me in those times.

striving for the impossible

So there I am in Diane, Kristen, and Jennie's apt trying to read this book that I have been trying to read everytime Im over there, and as I was rereading chapter one, I stumbled upon some great stuff (suff you shouldnt miss if youre really reading this book) so anyway here is parts of this passage by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. After which are some of my thoughts and why it is applicable at this time.

"... Until then, God's people remain scattered, held together soely in Jesus Christ, having become one in the fact that, dispersed among unbelievers, they remeber Him in the far countries.
So between the death of Christ and the LAst Day, it is only by a gracious anticipation of the last things that Christinas are privileged to live in visible fellowship with other Christians. It is by the grace of God that a congregation is permitted to gather visibly in this world to share God's Word and sacrement...."

There is more but mainly it is the same idea. Lately I have had a lot on my mind. One thing I have been thinking about is this place that I am in and the idea that I keep moving in and out of communities. Part of me thinks that I need to just pick a place and declare it my community to be the most useful. Is it right to mess up the order and leave the places we come from. There are a lot of problems that stem from these lives of transition that we live. In many other cultures it is not normal to leave the family/community/tribe. Those places have problems of their own Im sure, but loneliness is different and lack of community strips one of accountability and other things.
So theres that and more personally, I have been considering leaving the country for awhile for some volunteer work. Because of that, I have thought a lot about why I need to leave. I really do feel like I am being used in minstry here and I am surrounded by a great community. Why would I leave that (even though I know it is not a permanent thing that I am a part of here.) So reading this book by Dietrich Bonhoeffer spoke to me. I am so privileged to be here at this time and to be surrounded by "believers." I was also blessed at Olivet and growing up. And yeah, it does seem crazy to willingly enter into something that will probably make me lonely for awhile, but I think thats ok. We all strive to live in security and in community, but that doesnt mean that it will necessarily be possible here all of the time. I do not think we will ever have that security of a lasting community until the kingdom of God is here... whatever that will mean.

Peace, Love, and confusion,
Megan